If someone walked up to you right now and asked “What do you want in the areas of health, career, relationship, abundance, experiences” or other such life areas, how would you respond? Will you be able to immediately rhyme off a detailed list of your dreams and desires in each of these areas or would you concede defeat? Believe it or not many would concede defeat! Most people have either only a fuzzy idea of what they want or no idea at all! Only a small (very small) percentage of the population has detailed plans and ideas of where they are going! To which group do you belong?
I have to admit that up until recently I belonged to the ‘fuzzy’ crowded group. I spent most of my adult life thinking I was on the right track but not really having any clear idea about how the end result would look if I did arrive. The main problem was a lack of motivation. Or even better, a clear lack of enthusiasm for the goals I did manage to put down on paper and hang on my wall. When I look back at the small pile of notes containing past goals there was a noticeable common thread running through them. I chose goals that I thought I should want based on what I thought others wanted for me. Basically I was creating my life based on other people’s values. Makes me wonder how I even had the energy to write them down much less attempt to achieve any of them!
What Do You Really Want?
Stephen Covey, author of "7 Habits of Highly Effective People", once said, “Be sure that, as you scramble up the ladder of success, it is leaning against the right building.” Most people, as I personally discovered for myself, work hard at jobs or careers only to find down the road that they get no joy or satisfaction from it. This disempowering feeling occurs when your outer accomplishments does not align with your inner values and beliefs. My values centre around helping others, teaching, sharing and giving value. Creating and delivering articles centred around personal development and inspiration aligns perfectly with my value system!
Take time to examine your values and innermost beliefs. A well-known philosopher once said that ‘the unexamined life is not worth living’. Continuous clarification of your values is an ongoing endeavour. The happiest people in the world are those who live in harmony with their value system. One of the most valuable exercises you can do to determine who you really are and what you really want is to organize your values by priority. Once you are clear about the importance of your values, you can then organize your outer life so that it is in alignment with them.
Up until recently I thought I had my priorities in order, until I had coffee with my friend Pat Kammer! As I began relating my hectic life to her she sat and quietly listened. When I finished my rampage about my life, she asked why I was creating this for myself. I was blown away! Here I was telling her what a great job I was doing, how busy I was by traveling here and there and she wanted to know why I would choose this! In that instance I was stuck. I had no plausible response. Then I got it! She intuitively picked up from me that I wasn't happy. Apparently I was out of alignment with my values and goals. I was covering or ‘fronting’ as they say on the street. Once it was understood that I was moving away from what was important to me, my hectic schedule suddenly became a burden and a heavy one at that!
That evening I went home and began choosing differently. Nothing changed for awhile and then suddenly I found myself without a job! I was free to live the life I had imagined and I owe this all to a kind lady that had the courage to ask a simple, quiet and unassuming question!
Please take time to ask it of yourself. This is the single most important question you will ask within your whole life!
Past vs. Future
No matter what your age or circumstances, it’s time to sit down and decide who you are and what you want. Remember – it doesn’t matter where you’re coming from all that really matters is where you’re going. Life is full of examples of people that either fell on hard times or where truly down and out and living on the streets and turned things around. How did they do this...they did it by choosing differently! J.K. Rowling, the author of the Harry Potter series, made such a choice. J.K. lived in her car and off welfare before the fabulous success of her books. Now she is one of the wealthiest people in Britain (I hear she is worth more than the Queen!) Take time to google her amazing story! I'm certain that most or all of you are not in such dire circumstances, so the only thing you have to do is just choose!
Goals (prelude to Part 1)
In future articles I will speak to the importance of writing clear, measurable goals. I would like to make a point about them before then which is, you'll see a measurable difference in your life the very first day you establish clear, committed goals, even if your first few attempts aren't perfect. You'll be able to make decisions much more rapidly because you'll see how they'll either move you towards or away from your goals.
Clear goals allow you to achieve H.L. Hunt's (a man who rose from a bankrupt cotton farmer in the 1930s to a multi-billionaire when he died in 1974), success formula. By deciding exactly what you want to accomplish, committing it to writing, and reviewing it on a daily basis, you bring your goals into reality with the power of your focus.
Tips for Clarifying Your Values
1. List your top 5 most important values in your life today. What do you really believe in and stand for?
2. What qualities and values are you known for among your friends and family or those who know you best?
3. What do you consider to be your most important guiding principle? Ie. Trust, kindness, honesty, thoughtfulness.
4. What are your values regarding money and financial success? Are you practicing these values daily?
5. Describe your idea of an ideal person, the person you would most want to be if you had no limitations.
6. What one change could you make in your behaviour today that would help you live in greater harmony with your values?
Take the challenge and choose the rest of your life today!
Tomorrow: 30 Day Success Challenge
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V.I.P – Very Inspiring Person – Pat Kammer
This week’s VIP is Pat Kammer! Pat has been instrumental in helping me along my own personal development path. She is wonderful, intuitive teacher, guide, healer and most importantly a great friend! Pat uses a highly effective healing technique – EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) to help those near and far clear debilitating symptoms. The results are astounding! She helped me in one session and I am forever grateful! Pat specializes in EFT to help such issues as weight loss, smoking, disease, pain, fear, anger, the list is endless. Pat is a mother, grandmother and a great-grandmother, as well as a respected entrepreneur in her community. Please take a moment to visit Pat to learn more about EFT and her other talents at her website: http://www.patkabundantlife.com/. Thanks Pat for your wonderful work and beautiful spirit!
